Feeds:
Posts
Comments

Posts Tagged ‘nhs’

Testing Times

My psychiatrist appointment is going to be rearranged – my care-co couldn’t make it, and I declined to go alone.

I had my “initial assessment” with the PCMHT today. I wish I could say it all went swimmingly and will be referred onto psychology as planned.

It didn’t start well when she revealed that she knew next to nothing about me. Past notes are archived after two years, and the only thing she had about me was a letter from my old psych – written in June. Not a trace of my GP’s referral, which was the one my care-co said he’d been told they were acting on. So, this was referral #3. With #1 never having gotten off the starting blocks, and #2 seemingly MIA, I was left wanting to throw something very messy at mental health services.

The truth is, it seems, there may be some issue about who funds this therapy that everyone seems to agree I need. It’s apparently “very unusual” (sounds kinda familiar) for the PCMHT to see someone who is also seeing the CMHT. I showed her my care plan, in an attempt to clear things up, but it backfired spectacularly – after she’d read it, she told me that what she’d read in it made her think I should be seen by secondary care psychology. She almost looked intimidated – I could practically see her mentalist alerts flashing, which was rather disconcerting, and gave me a lot of guff about “knowing how annoying it can be when different services keep saying no to you”. She did then try to ring my care-co, but he wasn’t in the office (he never is), and that was very nearly an end to the appointment – but I did manage to convince her that going ahead with the assessment would save time just in case, especially since my care-co is only planning to stay involved “until the psychology referral is sorted” (having been the person who first uncovered what a mess the professionals have made of this, I think he’s trying to make sure I don’t slip through the cracks again).

It then took her an hour to do the flipping risk assessment. I was surprised at how affronted I felt over being asked to “give my assurance that I wouldn’t try to hurt myself”. I tried to explain that not even my worker at YP-place has ever asked me for that, and there was no way I’d give that to some random lady, however well meaning, that I’d only just met. The only person I can recall who ever asked me that was a psych nurse in the hospital, who was trying to work out if I was OK to discharge (having spent the whole weekend in a 12 hour assessment unit, while other patients came in and were sent home around me…). Even when I’m suicidal, asking me questions like that only makes me lie – how is that a productive question to have on a risk assessment if it turns your clients against you?

In the end I offered up an alternative question that I was happy to answer (and luckily, in the negative), stolen from previous risk assessments “How likely is that you might try to harm yourself?”, but I don’t think I managed to get across to her just what my objection was. Apparently they “always ask everybody that question”.

By the time we finished the risk assessment, we were already 90 minutes through a 60 minute appointment, and she was struggling to fit everything into the small boxes on the form. She suggested we break it there, and meet again to finish the assessment, which we were, to quote “nowhere near finishing”.

Then she started in on the page headed in big bold letters “Evidence of serious mental illness”, trying to cram more of her very small writing into too-small boxes. I reminded her that she’d already proposed to stop – she countered that this bit was important as it could be “the sticking-point”.

All I can say is that I’m glad I finally convinced her that I was getting really fed up of it and wanted to stop there before we did any more “just the next page”s. She never did get to finish quizzing me on hallucinations, illusions and delusions, which was a good thing, as by that point I was downplaying everything, trying to convince her that I was mental enough to need a psychology referral but not so mental that it was inappropriate.

I did, however, have to wait for yet more time, while she photocopied that oh-so-damning care plan.

Outcome: I have to wait to hear whether I’m deemed too severe to be seen by primary care, and booted up to secondary care (who, of course, as we all know, only see people with Severe and Enduring Mental Illness, which of course I’ve repeatedly been deemed not to have).

Read Full Post »

Got the reply to my DLA application today.

I’ve been awarded middle rate care and lower rate mobility

Hard not to feel like I’m a fraud, especially since, as my psych reminded me last week, I don’t have a “severe and enduring mental illness”, and thus can’t get any help from the NHS except what I have atm (3 monthly psych appointments and an infinite waiting list for therapy in primary care that I was put on over a year ago).

Read Full Post »