Archive for July, 2010

A: None, they can’t find any trace of it.

The referral to Psychology a year and a half ago may not have actually been done.

Apparently, it’s down on my records – several mentions of “Chouette will be referred”, “Chouette has been referred”, but when my care-co actually rang up Psychology and asked, they had no trace of it. It seems that instead, my GP had referred me herself back in September when I insisted on some confirmation that I was indeed on their waiting list. But not actually told me that it was a new referral.

So I’ve waited at least 6 months longer than necessary. Possibly more, as the letter I got at the start of the week seems to have been in response to a letter from my psychiatrist last month.

I’ve been asked if I want to make a complaint.

I’m still trying to decide.


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Update from the Front

As I’m still lacking material to blog about (Dear Diary, today I bought some coca-cola and finished putting up a flat-packed desk), I thought I’d give a flash update to show I’m still around etc.

Mentally, I’m doing a lot better than I was. Slightly better that I should have done due to a brief period of me accidentally-on-purpose missing out my trazodone, but I’ve chilled out since then, so no more mad cleaning sprees at 3am. Which is possibly a shame, since my flat could do with some cleaning, but hey, you win some, you loose some, right?

Definately waking up, and doing things i haven’t done for ages. Unfortunately, my hormones are making up for lost time, and trying to convince me to rush down to East Anglia and seduce a bloke I haven’t seen for over a year. In my dreams, he declares me his long held secret love, and we ravish each other. In reality, I sent him a FB poke and drove myself crazy with old photos in a failed attempt to convince my hormones he wasn’t all that. They didn’t listen. Bad hormones!

Occupational therapist has convinced my psych to put me back on her list while I’m under the CMHT so that all the correct boxes can still be ticked.

After a year and half of waiting to see a psychologist, I got a letter from the PCMHT asking me if I still want it, and that if I don’t let them know within two weeks, they’ll take me off the list and I’ll have to be re-referred. In fact, I couldn’t believe my eyes, and thought it was too ridiculous to be true but unfortunately it still said the same thing when I reread it.

It’s looking unlikely that I’ll be able to get any money from ESA, as I haven’t been able to get sick notes, especially not for the six months prior to my claim that I need in order to claim under youth rules. It’s a bit of a catch 22 – if I’d been well enough to be getting out and seeing doctors and shouting to the rafters about how much I was suffering, then I’d have no trouble getting notes… and also wouldn’t have been ill enough to need them.

I also got a lecture from a GP about needing to make more of an effort and a year being far too long to be out of work.

So there you have it folks, a new amazing self-help treatment for depression, available on the NHS: pulling your socks up. You heard it here first!

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An Exercise in Comparison

I’m using the “relapse indicators” part of each document, because, frankly, that’s the only bit they share in common.


CPA Care plan, present

  1. Chouette no longer takes medication because of lack of insight
  2. Chouette thinks about taking her own life and has ideas that suggest to her that suicide might be a positive thing to do
  3. Chouette hears voices or believes other people might be talking about her in public
  4. Chouette has difficulty differentiating between reality and her dreams, experiences depersonalisation and/or wanders


Crisis Team “discharge plan”, last year

    Disturbed sleep, loss of appetite, suicidal ideation

Which one looks most like it might refer to my past?

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