Archive for June, 2009

Long Time No Post

you could have it all
my empire of dirt

I will let you down
I will make you hurt

Guess I’m just posting to say that I’m still around, struggling through the days in my duvet cocoon.

Been a long time since I last saw my energy, motivation, or a good night’s sleep.

But I am still alive, still fighting. Somehow. Not sure how much longer for.

full of broken thoughts
I cannot repair
beneath the stains of time
the feelings disappear
you are someone else
I am still right here


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Increasing Gradient

I haven’t blogged for ages, I haven’t really had the motivation to do so… but at the moment I’m procrastinating on going to sleep, just to put off the inevitable waking up.

My mood, my sleep, my neck are all screwed up in a hopeless triangle. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

I’m trying to concentrate on coping and positive thinking, but it’s hard when muscles ache and thoughts slip away.

Logically I know that I’m being supported by the duloxetine, but I have a fear of slipping, and I know that if I slip again then there will be no more help forthcoming, I have to haul myself up on my own or just let go into that oblivion.

I’m confused, tired, hacked off.  I missed my doctor’s appointment (to discuss sleep/neck issues) today because I got muddled with the time of it (receptionist rebooked it for next Wednesday), I missed voting in the local/EU elections because I was (for once) asleep on my bed after two glasses of wine.

I want to hibernate, somewhere nice and warm and comfortable, with a magic wand to take away the pain.

No can do?


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